pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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