Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
