my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Will you blow on my dice?
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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