I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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