even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
