Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize