That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Randomize
