Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
