She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
