Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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