dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
