Your tits are I can't wait for
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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