she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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