Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
