Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
