So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
