Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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