Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
