That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
