My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
