Fuck appropriateness.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
