Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
