i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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