I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
