idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
