I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'm too high and old for this...
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
