Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Randomize
