I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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