Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize