he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
do herpes really smell.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize