So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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