So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Randomize
