As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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