And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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