i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
