she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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