shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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