Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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