I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Randomize