Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
