ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
