So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize