I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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