Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
