problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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