Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
