Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize