He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
