I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
whose ass print is on the piano?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
