I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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