i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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